Die Kinder wie immer Schreien.

First of all, I realize that these are pretty long and it takes patience to get through... so if you don't make it to the end, I understand. If you DO make it through it all, I salute you.

So about two hours after I went to bed last night, I awoke to the shrieks of Sara. After several minutes of waiting for it to go away or for her mother to come, I came to a few conclusions: a) Esther was either still sleeping or choosing to ignore Sarah, and b) poor Simon was no more than four yards away from his wailing sister and would soon experience hearing loss... so I went to see what was wrong.

When Sara saw me, she was not calmed. In fact, I may have given her screams a little boost. I knelt beside her bed and began to rub her back while whispering "shhhh." She yelled "DU BIST NICHT MAMA! MAMA KOMMT! MAMA KOOOOOMMT!" and progressed to swing her entire lower body in my direction (which, I'm sure to her shagrin, had little effect since she weighs no more than forty pounds and had bad leverage.) I continued to rub her back (while restricting her legs) and when there was a small pause in her cries, said "Was ist los, Sara?" Good news- it reignighted her screams. After a minute or two of this, I finally said "Okay, ich werde gehen" and went back to my room.

Sara continued to scream, but stopped after a minute or two. Besides an occassional whimper, she was impressively silent for (what I guestimate to be) around 10 minutes. At that point, she tried shrieking again, but quickly gave up.

I asked Esther (and Frank when he got home tonight) why she cries, and they both say it appears to be for no reason. Occassionally, she has bad dreams... but otherwise, wir alle haben keine ahnung.

Sara cried this morning because she didn't want to get dressed.
She cried at lunch because her mother wouldn't let her put copious amounts of cinnamon-sugar on her milsch reis.
She cried at the end of lunch when, after he mother counted to three and she still refused to obey, her mother said we would not be going to visit ponies.

But the good news is that the pony incident was the last of the crying for the day... well, she woke up again briefly tonight, but it was very brief and not neeeearly as loud. Plus her dad was home and could calm her. And a shriek or two when she and Simon forgot how to share toys. But besides that, kein mal.

It is REALLY hard to reason with a child when you don't speak the same language. I mean, I'm pretty sure Sara would be equally as challenging to reason with regardless, but I'd at least like a fair fight!

Honestly though, even though it can feel like they scream all the time, they are such lovey kids the rest of the time! And the rest of the time occurs more often than the screaming - it's just not as loud, and thus not as distinct. I can name all the times the kids cry, but I can't name all the times they snuggle with me or laugh with me or want to play with me. Truly, they are perhaps the best little snugglers ever :)

I know it's only been three days, but dang it- I want my German to be better NOW! I know that I'm growing - in hindsight - but in the present, it feels like I am only using my old German skills and not developing new ones. I know that isn't true, but it is just so frustrating when I can only say so many things and rearrange words in so many ways to sound new.

Today we went to the library and rented a couple movies I've seen before, in hopes that it will help me understand it better in German. Two problems here: first of all, the language moves SO fast that I truly can barely hear a word they say; and second, the subtitles (also auf Deutsch) are probably less than half of what they're actually saying so it's impossible to try and match the words I see with the words I hear, besides the fact that the subtitles have to move quickly with the speech so I don't even have time to read the subtitles, let alone understand!! I tried to find movies I knew really well, and then I gave the stack to Esther to choose from. Unfortunately, they didn't have Wayne's World- I could quote that thing back and forth! Also unfortunately, Esther chose "Runaway Bride" which I like, but am not on a "I quote this movie in my every day conversation" basis with. I caught some actual phrases they said here and there, but if I didn't know the basic plot of the film there's no way I would've kept up. I think we should try Disney... I'm pretty sure there are only a few I haven't seen and the rest I've seen a hundred times (plus, childrens movies should be simpler... right?!)

We also went to a shopping center since I forgot closed-toed shoes (besides a pair of winter boots and some cute boots that really do nothing to keep out water or cold). Seeing as I will soon be on close terms with rain, good shoes are a must. Also, I bought my first ever rain jacket. I have never owned a rain jacket before. Usually if it rains I either don't go outside or move as fast as I can and deal with wet clothes. With shoes and jackets, I had to establish my size since they are not like in America. Fun fact: my shoe size is 39 and while a size 42 jacket is maaaaybe okay, I should really have a 44 or 46. Good for the ego? Nicht so viel.

Please pray that God will help me to embrace the parenting methods of Frank and Esther. I am used to dealing with kids very differently than it seems they are, and I don't want to be judgmental. I don't think I am on the outside, and it isn't that I am feeling tense or angry or superior on the inside... after all, I'm NOT a parent and don't know anything close to what it's like. I just know how I am used to handling bad behavior, and find it hard that it is not similar to the practice of the household. I think of what would happen if Sofie screamed like either of these kids, and while she had her tantrums (which is typical for kids, it's not unusual and shouldn't be seen as bad parenting)... I know Mrs. Aspaas would put it to a quick end. But then I realize that because it is in the nature of how the Aspaas' parent, Sofie would most likely never scream like Sara or Simon... making it a pretty useless mental analogy.

Anyway, please pray that I will properly accept, appreciate, and enforce the parenting style of Frank and Esther, and that I will not constantly be thinking that I know a better solution.

LG,
~Julia~